The Secret Lounge's Guide to Hosting Sex Parties

Are you looking for a great sex party?

Then join the crowd who attend The Secret Lounge parties.


So many people complain they can’t find the right type of wicked party that they want & is local to them. Well, our answer is to become your own hero & host a sex party!


What is more local than hosting a party at your own place? You can control everything. The guests, the food, the music, the games, everything! You also will be able to control the party rules & boundaries to ensure the sex party is at the right speed & style for you.



Hosting a sex party is a great way to connect with others in the lifestyle community. You’ll make plenty of new friendships & stay better connected with your old friends. If you have been wondering how to be invited to the underground private parties that aren’t advertised, hosting your own party is one of the best options.


When people see you stepping up & organizing a party, they will reach out to you about their parties. People like seeing others helping themselves & not sitting on the sidelines waiting for someone else to do all the work.


We understand that hosting a sex party isn’t easy or simple, so we are here to help you. Please don’t freak out over all of the information we are about to cover. Remember, this is your party. You can make it as fancy or as simple as you want. So let’s walk through all the different considerations to make this experience as fun & enjoyable as possible for you!


First, we should figure out what type of sex party you are hosting. You did know there are several options, right? We aren’t even talking about the countless party themes. Let’s first decide the basic type of party you’ll be hosting.


Types of Sex Parties

Meet & Greet – Not exactly a sex party but still a swinger party. You can host a socialising party for local swingers to meet each other without any playing (aka sex) at your event. Usually, they are held at vanilla venues.


House Party –

The more common swinger sex party you’ll encounter and what we specialise in at The Secret Lounge.

Couples & friends are invited to socialise with others. If a connection happens, they can head off to the play area for fun times. Couples can play together with other couples, and many will also play separately.


Girls Uncorked –

These are meet & greet wine tasting parties but only for the female half of the swinging couples. The ladies’ meet-up offers an excellent opportunity to ask questions, support each other, and build connections in a simplified setting without men. The swinger dating site Kasidie started these parties, and they have party ambassadors in many cities.


Skirt Party –

These are sex parties only for ladies. It is fun playing with men, but it can also be fun to experience lady-only play without rushing those soft touches & sensual lips.


Masturbation Party –

Not the most common party, but some do enjoy them. It removes much of the stress & pressure since play is limited to masturbating yourself & possibly others.


Key Party –

This is more a Hollywood invention with people picking car keys out of a fishbowl to find out who is their sex partner. Swingers usually prefer choosing their partners, but swingers also like new things. So you might come across a key party. If you have a key party, it is wise not to make it mandatory to participate. This way, you can also invite people who prefer to choose their own partners without feeling pressured.


Bi/Gay/Trans Play Parties –

There can be a stigma with bi or homosexual play. We never said life is perfect, and the lifestyle isn’t. These parties allow all bi, gay, & trans people to play without fear of judgment. Our Naughty Bi Nature parties cater to this truly fabulous dynamic.



Orgy/Gangbang Party –

These group play parties are common to the swinging lifestyle. They require extra care due to the group play dynamic. You will want to ensure everyone understands the rules you decide upon & actively consents to the group play. If not, you might have a misunderstanding causing big-time drama. It is wise to have non-playing people oversee this party, especially if you have unknown guests attending.



BDSM Dungeon Party –

BDSM and swinger sex parties are very similar but also very different. Because of the risks involved, BDSM parties are much stricter on active consent. Usually overseen by experienced dungeon masters who oversee safety & rule adherence and extra elements like an after-care room because BDSM is not only about inflicting pain or controlling others. If you aren’t very familiar with BDSM, you shouldn’t try to host this type of party. Yes, dungeons can be a hot fantasy, but it takes extra work to ensure it’s done the right & safe way.


Fetish Party –

People that open-minded enough to enjoy non-monogamy often enjoy other fetishes like latex, foot play, role-playing, etc. These fetishes might not always be welcome at local sex clubs.

Some will host house parties for their friends who share the same fetish or want to experiment.


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