Top 15 Swinger Myths Revealed

Swinging isn’t really something done in public so that has lead to the sex-starved public jumping to assumptions and an explosion of myths about swinging. Hollywood loves these myths because they are sensuous and an easy plot tool for movies and TV shows.

They don’t really care about these myths being inaccurate.

So we are going to help clarify the top swinger myths for you.


Myth 1: Swingers always want sex

This myth is totally wrong. Nymphomaniacs always want sex and that is very different from swinging. Sure, swingers enjoy living a sexier life but in reality swingers tend to be a bit particular when it comes to sexy time because they aren’t desperate. There is plenty of polite swinger rejections as swingers only play with people they actively enjoy. Swingers are living a free life where consenting & respectful adults have the power to do what they enjoy, when it works for them, with people they like. They are not out of control sex maniacs. Just respectful mature adults who enjoy consensual fun.


Myth 2: Swinging is cheating

Swinging is consensual fun times between adults. The swinging lifestyle is not cheating if everyone is informed, consenting and happy. Cheating is when someone in a committed relationship breaks a rule and the trust with their partner. That is totally different from swinging. Swingers love each other, trust each other, and respect their own personal rules & boundaries. Swinging tends to be more of a team sport with couples staying together and pairing up with other happy couples to have sexy fun in a same room swap. Swinging is not cheating because there is no deceit, breaking rules or broken trust. Just grown adults having fun together.


Myth 3: Swinging will stop your partner from cheating

While swinging isn’t cheating, it doesn’t mean it’s impossible for swingers to be cheaters. When there’s honesty and communication in a swinger partnership, it can be amazing and make a relationship stronger. However, if your partner is looking to stray, swinging won’t stop them from doing that. If you can’t trust them in monogamy, you will feel just as uneasy in a swinger arrangement, probably even more so.



Myth 4: Swingers are all dirty freaks

Sorry but this myth is not really accurate. To be honest some swingers are interested in freaky fun but other swingers just enjoy a more simple & sexy approach to life. That is ok. Swingers are respectful of each other and understand that everyone has different preferences when it comes to sexy playing. We all have the freedom to choose the different things that we might enjoy or to say “no thanks” and skip the things that we don’t enjoy. You can be as kinky or as vanilla as you like. The swinging community is a big place filled with people with many different preferences.


Myth 5: Swinging is only for couples

Most swingers are couples but there are also plenty of single people in the swinging lifestyle. Usually single people are dating other single people but that doesn’t mean they can’t be swingers. There are plenty of threesomes in the swinging world and that means plenty of single people. All single ladies aka unicorns and single men are welcome in the swinging lifestyle as long as they are honest, respectful and consenting. It is a very welcoming community that is more concerned about being friendly and enjoying life and less concerned about strict labels. Life is much more fun when we are accepting of others.


Myth 6: Swinging ruins relationships

Swinging is about consenting adults working together with open & honest communication to do what they both enjoy. Those are fundamental elements for any good relationship. Unfortunately in real life not every relationship has these good fundamental elements and those relationships are at risk for breaking down. Not because of swinging but because the relationship lacks the fundamental elements like trust, communication, consent, and empathy. Swinging won’t ruin a good relationship but it also won’t save a bad relationship. Couples should fix their own relationships before complicating it with swinging.


Myth 7: Swinging will save your marriage

This is a big misconception, so let’s restate that if your marriage is in trouble, swinging is not for you. Opening your relationship up to involve more people is just going to intensify the existing issues. If you and your partner struggle with jealousy and dishonesty, you can be sure it will only be made worse by exploring the swinger lifestyle. Swinging is best to enhance relationships that are already on a solid foundation, and both want to try something new. It’s not a remedy for a broken partnership.



Myth 8: Swingers all have STDs

Thankfully this myth is totally false. Swingers aren’t silly teenagers having risky sex which is why most research shows swingers tend to have about the same STD rates as the general public. That might sound surprising but they are responsible adults that are educated about the STD risks of swinging and take smart precautions to keep themselves healthy. Medicine & scientific research has greatly advanced from where it was 20 years ago to make it easier for educated adults to practice safer sex and protect their health so they can keep enjoying sexy fun for many years.


Myth 9: You can identify swingers by secret symbols

Remember how we talked about swingers not being nymphomaniacs? Swingers aren’t always interested in sex. Plus many swingers tend to value their privacy and don’t want to be bothered while they are living their everyday life. This is why there really aren’t secret swinger symbols or signals. There are some unofficial things like black rings and pineapples but honestly they are more tongue in cheek & less actual methods used by swingers.


Myth 10: Swinging women are sluts

A grown woman is more than capable to figure out what she likes and how to responsibly enjoy it. Swinging helps empower women to explore their sensual curiosities in a respectful space without the outdated toxic shaming that can come from repressed people filled with hate. Life is too short to listen to the haters. All women and men are free to enjoy the friendly and supportive swinging lifestyle to explore their sexual desires.


Myth 11: All women who swing are bisexual

Swinging lifestyle supports bisexuality and even encourage the opportunity to explore for women in the lifestyle. However, many women who start swinging wouldn’t identify as bisexual, and have to ease into the possible idea of exploring their bi-curiosity. Additionally, there are women who swing for years and decide never to explore that side of their sexuality, and can still swing with lots of couples as a straight woman. Being a bisexual woman isn’t a pre-requisite to be a swinger, but of course there are women who do take the opportunity to be with other women while remaining in their heterosexual relationship. Swinging provides a great opportunity to explore bisexuality if you feel like it.



Myth 12: Swingers are perfectly open minded

As a general concept, this is true but it’s not 100% perfect! However, nothing in life is perfect and that includes swinging. There can be some prejudice towards bi-sexual men, gay/lesbian couples are rare in the community, and there can even be a touch of racism in swinging – you might encounter a couples that writes “Caucasian couples only” in their online dating profiles. Obviously this isn’t true of everyone, and compared to the general population swingers are very open minded… but that doesn’t mean every swinger is perfectly open minded about everything.


Myth 13: Swingers are all unattractive or super attractive

Swingers come in all shapes, sizes, and ages. There are chubby young swingers, there are fit senior swingers, and everyone in between, but most people involved in the lifestyle take great pride in the care of their bodies. When you know you’re going to be getting naked and exploring with new people, it’s in your best interest to stay fit so you don’t run out of energy during the sexual fun. This stereotype probably stems from the inclusive nature of the lifestyle, because it’s not an exclusive club. There are of course people who don’t get hung up about their appearance and just want to have fun! Swingers are regular people that come in all shapes & sizes, so you’ll fit right in.