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Tonight’s the big night. You and your spouse are dressed to the nines. You’ve got your location picked and maybe even a nice bottle of bubbly on hand to set the mood.

Couple ready to attend a swingers event
Couple ready to attend a swingers event

Yes, tonight’s the night you and your spouse enter uncharted territory: swinging for the first time. This is what you want, but you thought you’d be more excited than nervous. It turns out it’s the latter.

What can you do to soothe first-time swinging jitters? Read on, as we’ll tell you with this handy list of tips.

1. Control Your Breathing

Your heart is like a jack hammer, and you can’t breathe in enough air. It’s going to be hard to enjoy yourself like this, so our first tip is to control your breathing. Start with a slow breath in, then gradually release it. Repeat this until your body starts calming down.

2. Temper Expectations

Having sex with anyone for the first time means adjusting to their likes and dislikes while they learn yours. Don’t walk in expecting this to be like something out of a porno. It’s not going to happen.

3. Communicate, Communicate, Communicate

To make the night as exemplary as possible, you must communicate. If you don’t like something they’re doing, say so! If you have a favourite technique, then share it. Even in swinging, no one is a mind reader. Communicate your interests and desires to have them fulfilled.

4. Have an Exit Plan or Safe Word

Listen, your first swinging experience will probably be fabulous. Just in case it’s not, discuss an exit plan and/or safe word with your spouse. Keep this between the two of you and use it if need be.

It’s perfectly natural to be nervous the first time you and your spouse swing. With these handy tips, the two of you can overcome your jitters to have an incredible night!

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